The Birth Story

I feel suddenly connected to the outside world sitting down and writing for this blog. Ive felt so many emotions over the last few days! Giving birth and having this beautiful baby so dependent on me has been the most overwhelming thing Ive ever done.

Ive found its been difficult for me to to come to terms with how it went and a day after the birth I was just feeling so grateful to be alive. I never once felt out of control or disappointed throughout labour and delivery. I was aware that God was there with me at all times. I'm amazed and stunned by such a life changing moment.

For those interested in the birth story here goes... this has been important for me to get straight in my head as to process what happened. Indulge me.

At 8:00am I had little twinges, feeling like period pains. Andy was just ready to go to work and I had planned to drive to our NCT classes (antenatal classes) for 10:00am. I felt I was being a hypochondriac telling him about them, but Andy resolutely decided I wasn't going anywhere without him on that Monday the 26th March. He drove me to the class. The pains started to come more often and at one point I had to get out of my chair and walk around in the middle of the class. Everyone was getting excited but I still didn't believe anything was happening. We decided to go for pub lunch and I think the landlord was concerned as I was going to the loo so often, looking like I was struggling to keep it together. At least we got our food quickly.

At home I got the TENS machine on and frantically tried to pack my stuff for the hospital. I got really focused on dealing with the contractions. By 5:00pm we rang the hospital and were told we should come in. When we got there I was 4cm dilated, officially in established labour, at 8:00pm the midwife said the pool would be a good option if I still wanted a water birth. I couldn't believe it was happening so quickly. I was looking forward to having the natural birth I had thought would be so easy. The water was so comforting and I really enjoyed it. Andy was really supportive throughout, constantly encouraging, telling me I was doing well. Ali the midwife was really cool, she was young but experienced and kept an eye on me the whole time.

I was feeling like pushing during some of the contractions. Ali noticed I was loosing a bit of blood and due to the baby's heart rate rising as well was concerned about the possibility of an abruption. Id have to come out for to see how dilated I was. I was 8cm and there were concerns about me and the baby. I was strapped up to a monitor and contractions slowed down. Ali had consulted with the doctors, running through her concerns and syntocin was suggested to speed up labour. I had been so careful not to have any medical intervention and knew this could lead to more complications but it looked like the only way to get the labour sped up to get her out.

Inka didn't like the drug and her heart rate soared. To be honest at that point I cant remember much, except that there suddenly was 2 doctors in the room. The registrar said I was fully dilated but they would have to give me an episiotomy and ventouse to get the baby out because of the stress she was under. I couldn't believe it as they strapped my legs to the stirrups and were asking me to push! I didn't want to be on my back and certainly didn't want it like this. I knew it wouldn't be long till I saw her so in a way it was a relief, and I knew Ali had done all she could for me.

Anyway...pushed her out within half an hour (with the doctor pulling pretty hard as well). Inka had decide to come out with her hand next to her face. Andy and Jean, my mother in law watched in horror. I think the whole experience was traumatic for them. Jean was wonderful as a support to Andy and calmed everything down. She had had a similar labour with one of her boys.

Inka was placed on my chest immediately, she looked so squashed and to be honest not what I expected. Puffy eyes, and squashy nose but she was looking at me and was so alert. I couldn't believe I had done it without any drugs!

I haven't been quite prepared for the recovery afterwards. Stitches, sore breasts, no sleep, hormonal ups and downs and an overwhelming sense of helplessness. The midwife picked up me not quite coping and found I was anaemic, hence back into hospital for a blood transfusion on the 3rd day. I feel like a different person now, it was the best gift someone could give me. I was speaking to Becky today and we were just saying that the staff at Worthing hospital are Angels, the jobs they do go beyond duty.

So now shes looking less squashed and is a real joy, so far a lovely easy going baby who is feeding well and has her daddy wrapped around her little finger already.

I just want to say thank you so much so you all who have texted, rang, send cards, flowers and those from church who are cooking meals for us this week you have no idea how special and cared for it makes us feel to know you care and love us. Bless you all and I hope to catch up soon and show Inka off. I am such a proud mum. (IM A MUM!!!!)